Beyond Surface-Level Solutions
Why tips and quick fixes aren’t working
It’s easy to find step oriented solutions to problems. The problem is that without direct feedback, we cannot go to the deeper levels that our inner issues require.
The problem with content that stays in the realm of ideas
Men are already wired to stay in their thinking minds. But when you are trying to solve a problem with your mind that your mind has created, you have an issue. You stay stuck.
How “doing more” culture creates inadequacy
Men are doers. They make things happen. But those deeper issues require a patience and space to “be”. We cannot grow if we stay in doing mode. When we stay there and continue to have the same issues, we then can feel inadequate. This adds to problems of frustration and depression.
The limitations of focusing on external success
Finding success externally has it’s place. But when deeper emotional and spiritual issues are coming to the surface, men can no longer depend on external validation. Men need to learn to validate themselves from a place of love and acceptance to feel truly whole.
Why deeper work is necessary
The endless search for a balanced life is something most people say they want. When men neglect deep inner work they cannot find any semblance of balance. Mood issues, irritability, anger, relationship issues. All of these things will remain as long as men search for surface level solutions that they think they are capable of fixing on their own.
The Awareness-Action Gap
Recognizing when something’s off but not knowing what to do
So you know something’s not right in your life. Now what? Read a book? Go to the gym? Sure those things are helpful and many times are necessary. But the growth that is required to change your life takes action and risk. Even if it’s just showing up and doing something new and uncomfortable initially. Without an action plan and accountability, men stay stuck.
Subconscious patterns working against conscious desires
Men don’t know what they don’t know. And to move into deeper self work you have to become aware of your conditioned mind. Most men don’t understand the level their minds have been conditioned. Learning about the self from a place of love and acceptance is crucial. Getting feedback on behavior and thinking is necessary for growth.
The trap of trying to change who they are vs. embracing their nature
Many men have been told they need to work harder. They need to change. But what if they knew they were already capable within the understanding they don’t need to “change” altogether. Most men when they hear their wives complain go to a place of inadequacy. But there is a difference between showing up fully present without shame and trying to be a different person. Self acceptance in all the ways possible is necessary to be the person you want to be.
How this gap perpetuates cycles of frustration
Again, men are doers. And when they don’t understand how to “do” something to make something change or “fix” something they can get frustrated. They can feel inadequate. Guilty. Shameful. When men growth their awareness through self love and acceptance, they can get out of the cycle of fixing problems and external validation from always “doing”.
The patterns I’ve observed working with hundreds of men 1:1 have shown me something profound: these aren’t individual failings but systemic challenges that require a communal solution. Men aren’t meant to solve these problems in isolation – that’s precisely what got us here. This realization has led me to create The Life Made Conscious Community, an online men’s community launching this month in August 2025.
This isn’t just another online space. This is an environment where men can:
– Get a 1:1 with me to establish goals and intentions
– Break free from isolation through authentic connection
– Develop clarity on purpose with structured guidance
– Learn emotional intelligence in a judgment-free zone
– Build relationship skills with honest feedback
– Access support without stigma or shame
– Make solid relationships
– Learn how to have fun again
In my next post, I’ll explore what the community will look like.
– What This Space Will Offer
– What I’m building, and why it’s not for everyone
– Why it’s right for you
I’ll break down the rhythm:
– Weekly Lens
– Live Calls
– Field Notes
– Reflection,
– Q and A
– Meet and greets
If what I’ve described resonates with you, send an email to john@lifemadeconscious.com
Type “I’m interested”.
I’ll send you a link to get initial access.
If you’re looking to learn more about the community in general, find a time that works for you here. We’ll set up a 1:1 to answer your questions. No charge.
Get the newsletter—> subscribe
And
Learn more at Life Made Conscious
I’ll talk to you soon.
John
What are your thoughts?