I Learned Discipline in the Army.
I Learned Trust When I Became a Father.
I spent 8 years as an Army Officer, leading small units and serving as an operations officer in a combat zone.
I learned how to execute under pressure. How to make decisions when the stakes were life and death. How to lead through chaos.
But I also learned something the Army doesn't teach: I wanted to lead from a place of love and value, not just from achieving results.
I cared about my guys. I wanted the space and presence to actually see them. Not just as soldiers, but as human beings.
That's when I started to understand the cost of constant performance.
You can execute. You can get results. But if you're not present, if you're just performing, you lose what matters most.
The Call to Something Deeper
I left the Army because I was called to help people in real-life scenarios outside of combat.
I became a therapist because I connect with people on a deeper level. I knew it was in my being. I had to give up being something that wasn't my highest calling, though it meant walking away from the identity I'd built.
I spent the next 15+ years working with people as a therapist.
And what surprised me most?
We're all in battle. Every single day.
Not in combat zones. But in our minds. With our past. In our need to control life.
Civilians were fighting the same war I'd fought, without the uniform.
They were performing, managing, controlling. Trying to keep it all together. Exhausted from the weight of it.
And honestly? I was doing the same thing.
When the Weight Became Too Much
The breaking point came when I had my second daughter. My oldest was 3. I was building my business.
And suddenly, I was my own boss. There was no one else to be accountable to. No mission to execute. No structure telling me what to do next.
I had nothing left to fight.
But I didn't know how to stop fighting.
I felt it in my body. Heavy on my heart, like the weight of the world on my shoulders, depression in my chest.
I was still performing. Still trying to control everything. Still managing myself like I was leading a mission.
But I couldn't come home and be present with my girls. I couldn't relax with my wife. I couldn't turn off the noise in my head.
I'd lie awake replaying the day, planning tomorrow, second-guessing every decision.
That's when I realized: If I kept doing this, I was going to lose everything I actually cared about.
Not my business. Not my success.
My ability to love and accept myself. My connection to my wife and daughters. The things that actually mattered.
The Shift
It took a few years of fighting to build my business and then letting go of control.
The shift wasn't one moment. It was a slow realization:
I am not separate from life. I am part of it.
I'm not a victim of my thoughts, my past, or my circumstances. I'm a limitless being creating my own reality.
That changed everything.
My relationship with life shifted. My relationship with my thoughts shifted. My relationship with my past shifted.
The first sign something was different? I felt free.
I started trusting life. Trusting myself.
I could come home and actually be there. The weight lifted. The constant mental noise quieted.
My wife saw it. She told me she could see the guilt and shame lift from me.
And with my daughters it's still a work in progress. but I can meet them where they are now. I don't see them as things I'm responsible for managing. I see them as humans. Perfect in their imperfection. Just like me.
My oldest is 14 now. My youngest is 10. And I'm learning to be present with them instead of performing for them.
Why I Work With Men
I transitioned from therapy to coaching men specifically because I get men.
I worked with women as a therapist, and still do to some extent, but I see something in men that called me to focus here.
Men can be strong and vulnerable at the same time. Guiding, caring, and grounded in their being.
I understand the military and masculine conditioning because I lived it. The pressure to perform. The weight of responsibility. The belief that you're supposed to carry the load alone.
I know what it's like to be part of something bigger than yourself and to lose yourself in the process.
That's the battle I help men win.
Not by achieving more. Not by becoming someone different.
What I Want You To Know
I don't have it all figured out. I'm just like any other guy. Faults and all.
I'm not a guru. There is no guru. Just life.
But I do know this:
Everyone has the power to be in the state of being they desire and create their own reality.
You don't need to fix yourself. You're not broken.
You just need to stop fighting life and start working with it.
To trust yourself instead of constantly managing yourself.
To be present instead of performing.
That's the shift. And it changes everything.
Want to Find Out How I Can Help?
I help men who are successful on paper but disconnected inside.
Men who are tired of performing and ready to be present.
Men who want to lead from trust instead of control.
Men who know something needs to shift but can't see what it is yet.
We work together to help you:
- Build self-trust instead of forcing discipline
- Respond from clarity instead of reacting from your head
- Show up grounded in who you are, not who you think you should be
This isn't about becoming someone new. It's about remembering who you've always been beneath the conditioning.
If This Resonates, It's Time To Start.
Find a time that works. We'll figure out where you are, what you're working through, and get started.