The most often heard comment in my office a few weeks into couples counseling: “I honestly thought we would come into counseling and you’d tell us that HE was the one who needed most of the work! Now I can see where my own stuff is adding to the problems we are having.” It is… Read More »
John Harrison LPCC
5 ways to deal with procrastination
I recently wrote about what procrastination isn’t and a bit about what it is, or what it might be. You can find that post here. I believe one of the biggest misnomers about procrastination is that it is synonymous with being “lazy”. Not only do I think that procrastination has nothing to do with being… Read More »
5 reasons procrastination has nothing to do with “being lazy”
The bane of my existence. The thorn in my pride. A pain in the a** (for others). Say it with me. “I am a procrastinator”. Now, for those that aren’t procrastinators, I say congratulations. I have no ill will towards you. My wife is a non-procrastinator and I derive endless inspiration from her tireless energy… Read More »
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t
One moment you’re so sure that your mind and intuition are telling you the right things. “I can’t tell him no. He’s going to be really upset if I do that.” “Don’t take the chance, there’s too much to lose.” “Nobody really cares what I have to say anyway. It’s a waste of time.” The… Read More »
Embrace the suck!
“Embrace the suck!” We used to say that to each other in the Army during miserable all day training exercises. These training excursions were always accompanied by temps in the 30’s and 40’s and steady perpetual rain. Carrying heavy loads of equipment while playing war games in the cold rain actually became funny to us…. Read More »
“I was weak, now I’m strong, so go sc**w yourself” A losing relationship strategy
When I posted my blog about how men in relationships and their lack of vulnerability, I promised that I would follow-up with something about women. It’s not that we need to bash men or women and our flawed relationship strategies, we just need to shed some light on why they’re dysfunctional. Let’s just call a… Read More »
What to look for when choosing a therapist
Frequently I hear from clients that they did like or did not connect with their past therapists. It could be easy to say that it’s just a simple matter of “there are a lot of bad therapists out there”, but I think it goes deeper than that. Getting therapy that works is about finding a… Read More »
The lack of vulnerability in men and how we’re playing catch up with women
We are arguably at a time of social change in history like none other. The age of women’s empowerment is increasing and has been for the last several decades. Women’s position in our society has changed drastically. Women are more self accepting and are more accepted in various arenas, such as the workforce, than ever…. Read More »
Indecisiveness and why making the RIGHT decision is overrated
One of the common themes with my clients that I see is their consistent questioning and doubting of themselves when it comes to making decisions. Decisions with raising kids, decisions with career choices, decisions with relationships, and especially ending relationships. “Will I make the right decision? Will it all work out? Will it happen… Read More »
Your “soul mate” isn’t “perfect” for a reason
Relationships are challenging at times, especially as we grow as adults. Relationships go through phases and stages. Ideally, we would like to choose a partner that moves through the growth of the relationship with us. We start from the “honeymoon” period where each partner presents him and herself as the ideal mate. We’re kind of… Read More »